*stRugGle*

sometimes, when seeing other people's acheivements..
my confidence level decreased..i feel down..
i feel like they're more talented and successful than i am..
i just cant b like them..
makes me feel that im useless..
i mean my contribution is lesser than them, even somtimes i dont contribute at all..
bcuz of dis, i don feel like talking to ppl..
i cant talk n act naturally to them..
there's always an invisible wall for me to present the true me..
i juz cant act like how im acting when facing my old frens...
y is dat happen to me?
it shouldnt b that way...
uni life....huh..
if u meet de wrong person in a wrong affair at de wrong place n time..
there is no fun at all!n u wont b expecting sth other ting to happen....
bcuz it wont happen de way u expected...
n there r many accidents in life..
sth which is not gud suddenly crush on u without any preparation to face it!
recently, i'd met a guy..
he's quite a special person to me..
cant deny dat i hav gud feeling to him too..
but i dare not to express it..
mayb im too worry dat we cant communicate well in real life..
cuz im not eng ed..im not expert in speaking eng....
n de acheivement of mine in dis year, i see none..!
feels like i don hav de qualification to b wif him..
n i tink that im not special enuff...
don hav special skills or sth which im talented in..
im juz a ordinary person who dont hav great achievement..
ok, mayb i look pessimistic now..
but dat's wad bother me now..
im trying to build my confidence level inside me..
i wanna b confident person..
it's an important element to me so dat i can do sth big n great!as i wish..
n do wadever i wan..
if not, even though i wish to do sth, but i juz dont dare to take de action..
n dis will make me regret later..perhaps..
how i wish dat there'll always a person who always support me, lend me a hand n add oil for me when i fall..
i really nid dat strength...