Numbness in me

I feel numbness when there's too much of heartaches. Instead of pain, I feeling nothing at all. My mind becomes blank. I don't know what to feel or what to say or how to react to that particular statements or incidents.

I was surrounding by many people and there a lot of noises. I heard nothing and I only see the notes in front of me. The words spoken were still lingering in my mind. I can't get rid of them.

Are they lies? For what have happened all these while, are they real? The reality seems fake, maybe I was dreaming. Or maybe not, I'm in fact living in reality. I don't know the truth!

Perhaps I should just forget what they have said and act like nothing happens. It was just some mere statements of suggestion, they don't symbolized anything or have any implied meanings. They were just some idiot discussions! Nonsense!! Why should I keep it in my heart? I should forget about it! I'm only troubling myself.

Now, I just want to feel something. Feel what's living in my heart and his. If only I can read minds and study human's heart, how cool will that be.